Its been 2 weeks and at first it was ok...yes I missed him and jumped every time the phone rang but it was just like he was just gone for a few days and nothing more...plus I was extremely busy with pictures, baseball practice and tournaments, and Rhonda & I took the kids to Cocoa for a few days to use our timeshare...then after the tournament and the kids went to their dads for a week...I have been here all by myself this week! Still very busy but very lonely...I miss him more now and have cried more in the last 2 days than I did in the beginning...I know it will get easier as time goes on but Im not enjoying this at all.
I learned along time ago not to take anyone for granted from personal experiences so I never took Larry for granted or so I thought...until now he is gone and I have to do everything here by myself. Mowing and weed eating 2 yards (we help our neighbor with her yard), taking out the garbage, fixing things that need to be fixed, feeding all 16 of our animals and going to bed by yourself and it all of a sudden feels different and I cant get comfortable...needless to say I haven't slept much...but I'm sure I will finally just give out and will pass out (not literally).
I have talked to him twice for 2 minutes each... he sounds good and has wondered himself what he has gotten himself into, but he is falling into place real well. He has been training since January here at home so when he took his PT test he ran the mile in 7.39 minutes and maxed out on all the sit-ups, pull-ups and push-ups! I am so proud of him and I cant wait to see him in August march across that field on his graduation day to have accomplished something he wanted very badly. He has written almost everyday so I do look forward to checking my mail (no not email it comes good old snail mail!) and I finally got his mailing address yesterday so today I sent out all the letters I have been writing him for the past 2 weeks.
I also miss our talks...we talked about everything...he truly is my best friend. I think it would be easier if I could at least talk to him about my day and how the kids are or how he is doing, but instead I have to wait for a 2 minute phone call when they tell him he can call. I have alot going on here and some decisions to make in the next few months. I really wish I could talk to him about them to have his opinion. I have written them in the letters but its not the same.
The mind is a very powerful thing and sometimes it can get the best of you, makes you think about what could happen. I have alot of fears of when he comes home if he will be the same Larry and will he still love us like he did...I know, I know that is just crazy talk...but sometimes things just happen and you cant control them...I know first hand on that one and I cant even imagine my life without him...
I guess Im just venting or feeling sorry for myself, tomorrow is a new day and hopefully I will be over it or at least not crying about it...Please keep our family in your prayers...
